I was lost in my story sitting across from her. She passionately explained my day to her. But all the while I watched her body language to make sure the words I choose were accurate. She did nothing but listen intently hanging on my every word.
So far I was doing good. At least that’s what I thought then the words ” It was a really bad day.” Came out my mouth.
I watch as her features crunched up into a frown and with a sweet therapeutic voice she said: “are you sure your WHOLE day was bad?”
Her question sent me back into my mind as I contemplated my day again causing me to question myself “did I really have a bad day?”
We’ve heard it all
“I’m having such a bad day”. Or “this is a bad day”.
But what I learned that fateful day is that bad days really don’t exist. I know what you’re going to say “what in the world is she talking about, of course, we have bad days”. Well, I’m here to challenge that thought.
Let me explain. Let’s take a typical “bad day”. You wake up one morning and you get ready for work. You’re excited because you had a chance to go through your entire morning routine.
You get in your car and drive to work. Making it there safely, you even listened to your favorite playlist the whole way there. While you’re sitting at your desk at work you check your bank account to find out that someone stole 50 dollars from you.
Upset you call the bank and they very helpfully cancel the card putting your account on alert. They even manage to giv you your money back. As the day continued you kind of got over the whole bank thing but it still kind of bothers you. However, you are able to smile and joke with coworkers.
As the day continued you drop coffee on your blouse. It turns out to be your favorite blouse so now your aggravated. You stare at the coffee stain in the bathroom mirror. You think about how horrible it was that someone took money from you. And now your upset about the bank thing all over again. You go back to your desk a lot more agitated then earlier.
By the time you get home, you get a call from your hairdresser. Your hair appointment has been canceled. No one can blame you if all you want to do is curl up on your couch. Grab a nice cup of tea and watch your favorite TV show.
Was that a bad day?
Most people will answer YES, but I challenge that notion. By telling you guys a secret “It was not a bad day.” It was only bad moments in the day.
Here is the secret to turning a bad day around.
Mindset, Mindset, Mindset
Did you get it? The secret is your mindset.
To turn a bad day around is to change your thinking about what a bad day really means. In the scenario above the whole day was not bad. Certain situation throughout the day we’re bad.
Money theft was bad, spilling coffee on yourself was bad, and your hair appointment being canceled was bad. But those were only circumstances throughout the day. Not the whole day.
Often times we speak with emotional words. The emotional words we use come from a place of irrationality. As a therapist I often time find my self challenging this exact thought process in my clients. I spend hours in my day challenging emotional speech.
That is why I brought you the therapeutic answer to turning around your bad day. If you put this small amount of information into practice you would have saved yourself a year in therapy. Okay, maybe just a couple of months. Challenging sentences like “I’m having a bad day” is half of therapy. So let’s learn the steps to challenging emotional thoughts.
When you find yourself halfway through the day about to utter the sentence “I’m having a bad day.” Stop and ask yourself “was the entire day bad, or where there situations that we’re bad?”. Now that we’ve changed the sentence and challenged the emotional speech something remarkable will happen. Your mindset would change right along with it.
You see the secret is that our speech pattern has a strong correlation to our thoughts. In other words, the way we speak affect how we think and feel. So, if your words are mostly negative then your thinking will be too. That means if you utter the words “bad day.” You have set the foundation for the whole day in your mind.
Once your mind is corrupted with negativity, your whole day will be. But now you know the secret.
It’s a three-step process
- Challenge the emotional speech
- Change the sentence
- Change your mind.
Now that you know the secret I just saved you a year in therapy or at least the first 3months. But now you are a little bit emotionally smarter. Now you are free To Live Freely.